Instead of Going Through the Motions

I had trouble with my blog feed yesterday, a super smart bloggy friend told me to delete my RSS button...and she was right! So, if your blog is not being caught by the feed readers, that may be why.

Also, I'm contemplating setting up a running blog so that the topic doesn't over-run this blog, it will be more of an online journal, of training and stuff I'm learning. Any thoughts? 

Lately I've been feeling a lot like I did when I first became a Christian.

There was a insatiable hunger to learn everything I could about my new Savior. I bombarded those around me who had known Him longer, who knew what they were talking about. Experiencing His forgiveness freed me in a way that made anything seem possible. It's as if I caught a glimpse of just how big He is, and I knew He had big plans.

And then regular, everyday life continues...and years go by, and I find myself continually fighting against apathy. Against putting God in a tiny little box. It's a constant battle. Maybe people reach a point of spiritual maturity where they don't battle this....or maybe it's human nature, and battling it is just part of having faith.

What I do know is this: He is bigger than my apathy, and He will not be put in a box. The second I call out to Him, He shows up...shakes my heart up again reminds me of who He is, what He's done.

And right now, I just can't get enough of Him. Learning new things, understanding old things. Standing back, in awe, as He moves in the lives of people around me. He's always doing it...I just miss seeing it sometimes. Not this time.

This song has been blasting through my iPod for the past few days.

No need to explain why.

I don't want my life to be defined as going through the motions. As a wife, a mom, a friend, a believer...heck, even a runner...just OK is not enough...I want His all consuming passion inside of me.

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Hoping the Obsessive Becomes Compulsive...

It's a funny thing...how sometimes I think I know about something, and then I start learning more on a particular subject and realize that I'm actually COMPLETELY clueless!

It happens all the time. Which should probably tell you something about me...but let's move on.

I have a bit of an obsessive personality. When I fixate on something, there's little that can distract me. This is both good and bad...my husband would volunteer testimony.

Anyways, my latest fascination is running. I'm not new to running...but I'm just figuring out there's more to it then slapping on some shoes and hitting the pavement. And the more I learn, the more I want to know!

This weekend it was time for new shoes. Believe it or not, I do not get excited about buying new running shoes. 1 - they're expensive and 2 - no matter how hard I try to convince myself...they are just not cute. Ever.

We have this cute little shop called The Runner's Flat. They evaluate your running form which helps in getting the right shoe. They also have all sorts of running stuff...which I know nothing about yet because I don't run enough to get any gadgets...but after being in that store, I now have a wish list.

I'm a little attached to my old shoes. I've gotten the same brand the past two times...they're comfy, and familiar. Turns out that this time though, I need a different kind. No sacred cow, right?!?

Old Mizuno shoes:

New Saucony Shoes:

Here's the new knowledge that's rocked my world:

• Shoes have a shelf life. You heard me. Even without running or using them, the materials can break down from just sitting on the shelf.
• Socks matter. Who knew?!? Cotton=bad. Makes your feet stay wet and causes blisters and other yucky stuff. So...I have some new non-cotton socks, that have a R and L on each foot...because they go on a specific foot...craaaaazy.
• I bought a Runner's World magazine, which I'm totally gonna subscribe to. In there I learned that running 3 miles 3 times a week (which is basically what I do right now) will NOT help in weight loss. *insert kicking and screaming* It will help in "maintaining" but if your body is used to it, it will not help in the losing of weight. BOO. I have to start "interval" training...I'm not even going to explain...
• One marathoner wraps her toes in duct tape to keep them from rubbing together...I find that fascinating...because I am a weirdo.
• After running, you have a 30 minute time slot to re-fuel and re-build your muscles. There are certain foods that do this best. SEE, I told you...so. much. stuff.

So, since I'm sure the only people that have actually made it this far in the post are people who run (or are very, very bored), give me you tips, your tricks, your secrets...come on....I gotta know. And, if you know of any great sights or blogs about running, please let me know!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to continue my sanitizing of the house via Lysol. Oh yeah...two more barfers last night ;)

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Redundant

I'm having some trouble blogging lately.  Let's call it a funk of sorts.  

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that everyday is a little like the movie Groundhogs Day...you know, where you wake up and do the same thing over and over and OVER.  Truthfully, I don't mind it...except that then I find myself talking about the same things over and over.  

So goes life.  So goes me.  Whether you know me in real life, or just through this little blog, I'm afraid that's what you get.

Here it is.  In all it's redundant glory...what's rolling around in my head:

• I'm pretty focused on running right now.  Getting back into shape so that it can proceed to the next level, and then the next level, and eventually to what seems the impossible level for me...the 1/2 Mary (which is what my inspiring friend who somehow convinced me I can do this thing called the 1/2 marathon...and from this point on I'm only calling it that ;) 
• That means I'm really trying to eat healthier...and drink more water *bleh*  Not even my new cute bottle can make it more appealing.
• I'm a bit obsessive over the weather too, biting at the bit for it to get nice out and STAY nice.
• I'm very very disturbed at the guys-wearing-scarves-for-purely-fashion-reasons.  It's freaking me out a bit.  I love scarves.  I think women look great in scarves.  Men....well let's just say I'm having trouble letting that one go.
• I love casual summer dresses.  This is going to be the year of the summer dress for me.  Who needs shorts when I can wear a cute dress.  See...it's all about the weather people.
• My iPod...I've mentioned it in every conversation I've had for the past month.  
• Easter.
• Julie...and the countdown till she gets here!
• Summer vacation...lazy days at the pool and park with my boys.

Let me have it, what can't you stop thinking/talking about!?!  

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Just Another Day in Paradise

Seriously, I got nothin' for ya today.  It's 1:00 and I'm still in my pajama pants and bathrobe.

Last night, my running partner and I decided we'd run after Bible Club instead of early this morning.  Turns out, that I run quite well when fueled by a couple shots of espresso...don't think I didn't take note of THAT little morsel of information. It's a good thing we did, because...

Fast forward to 2:30  A.M.  Ben and I hear Jake crying and then he stops.  We go back to sleep.  Little later Jake is standing beside the bed crying and wanting in bed with us.  Figuring he had a bad dream, we tuck him in the middle and snuggle...a few minutes later....he barfs, everywhere.

Turns out the crying previously mentioned was because he'd first barfed in his own bed, but managed to not get any on himself, thus the lack of smell.  He also failed to mention two very important words before getting in our bed.... I. Barfed.

Fast forward to 1:00 PM.  Jake's sacked out on the couch watching Sponge Bob and no longer barfing, but running a fever and not looking so hot.

I'm not gonna lie, when the doorbell rang and it was the Schwan's guy...I totally pretended to not be home.  It helps that it looked like I really wasn't home, because my van is missing.  My husband stole it from me in order to drive himself to work while his car is in the shop.  

My life is a country song ;)

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I'm In

Linda at 2nd Cup of Coffee is hosting this little challenge.  What's the challenge you ask?  To commit to get moving for 30 minutes a day (5 days a week) for the next 2 weeks.   Go on over to her sight to find out more, but the gist is...it starts tomorrow!   TOMORROW.
For the past couple of weeks I've been hobbling around like an old crippled woman...I blame amping up the running and yoga.  The sides of my stomach feel like someone punched me...they are that sore.   I'm doing The Biggest Loser Weight Loss Yoga...it is so stinkin' HARD...and I'm still at level one...if you can even count that, considering I can't even finish the whole 20 minute routine.  BUT, I'm counting Yoga in the challenge, because it's movement...and DANG IT, it's hard.  
Did I mention how hard it is?!?  I mean seriously, it looks so easy...but it's HARD.
So very very hard....
So, if you're in, let me know and go over to Linda's and let her know.  Then, in 2 weeks we can all link up and share our stories of pain and suffering...it's good times.
PS - I have that little *sarcasm on the little*  1/2 marathon coming up September 6th.  Technically training doesn't start for a little while, but my running was less than stellar all winter, so I've got to kick up the base mileage...which is kicking my tail right now.  You can also find me wandering around my house saying 13.1 miles...13.1 miles...what was I thinking, what was I thinking...

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Because I Like It...

Let's talk fashion today.

I love looking at People magazine to see what celebrities are wearing in their everyday life.   It really has nothing to do with the celebrity themselves...I pick the celebrities because they're the ones who can afford a personal stylist.    It's the stylists job to make each celeb unique and distinct...to make it look easy.

I want a stylist.  I want someone to just come to my house, look at the stuff I have and put new outfits together...because I end up wearing the same things with the same things over and over.   Heck, I don't even need a professional.  Maybe real life friends and I should just do that for each other?!?!  Hmmm...I think I'm on to something.

Anyways, I came across this sight the other day, and I think it's genius.  You can look up celeb's whose style you like, and then find a cheap version of the outfit with the LINKS already there!  My personal favorites are Katie Holmes and Reese Witherspoon's style.  

Super fun!  Well, to me anyways.  Can looking at how to put together outfits be considered a hobby?  If it is, then by golly I've finally found a hobby I like ;)  Because the running and the scrapbooking...they get on my last nerve sometimes :)

So tell me....who's style do you admire?

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No Sacred Cow

Ben and I had a pastor in our lives that always said that there was "no sacred cow" when it came to how he approached ministry.  It meant that he was always evaluating how the church was running programs and various things...if it once was working and serving a purpose but over time became more tradition than ministry, then it was gone...no sacred cows.

It's stuck with me.  It makes sense to me.  

It's easy in life to make things sacred that were never meant to be sacred.  Changing something does not mean that it's a bad thing, or that it never served its purpose, it just means that currently, it's time for something different.

I like to use the no sacred cow idea in my life outside of ministry as well.  From anything as simple as hair products to the more complicated, like relationships.

My life, like yours, is chuck full of relationships.  And lately, I've noticed I'm having trouble just keeping up with people.  Old friends, new friends, bloggy friends, family, ministry, on and on.  The end result usually leaves me feeling guilty.

Guilty that I don't talk with so and so anymore, guilty that one friendship takes priority over another, guilty that I haven't made that call, written that note, sent that card, left that comment...followed up on their life.  My lack of doing any of those things in no way reflects on how If feel about that person, it reflects my life....my time...my priorities.

And that's where I find my sacred cow.  The sacred cow of friendships.  

Don't ya just love those friends who you haven't talked to in forever, but the moment you have a chance to catch up, it feels like you pick right up where you left off?!?  Those are the friendships that last, that survive, because both people understand that life goes on...and sometimes, it goes on without each other, but it doesn't mean the friendship is gone, it just means it's changed...it's always there...it just looks and feels differently than before.  

I've been seeking out God's help on this stuff...big time.  I need Him to show me which friendships need more focus, and which ones are changing.  As I was mulling my thoughts over with Ben, he shared something that really hit me.  It was something to do with Chemistry and atoms...and I will of course butcher the explanation because of my complete idiocy in all things science...but it was something to do with atoms and molecules and how only so many molecules can be grouped together at a time.  If there's too many they break off and form another group.  (Ben and my chemistry teacher are hanging their heads in shame right now ;)

That analogy though is so true.  As women, we grow and change and "break off" so that we can be blessed by new friendships.  It doesn't mean the old one is broken or bad, it means that in order to bless and be blessed by new friends, we've got to be willing to let go of the all the time invested in the old ones and invest some in the new.

"Make new friends, but keep the old..."  You know the song.  Seriously, I should have just stuck to the bullet list form because I've even lost myself in this post!  Good luck to ya'll! ;)

It boils down to this:

• I'm learning to appreciate all of the friendships God has blessed me with.
• Some of those are going to require more time than others.
• No need to feel guilty.
• Those old friendships, that require the least maintenance are often the best.
• Let go of the guilt.
• I can't "be there" for every friend.  Even if I want to, I'm not meant too.  Not meant to.
• Letting go of the guilt that was never supposed to be there in the first place...
• See a theme?

So, to all my old friends:  I love you.  You know I do.  I think of you...I remember our history, it's part of me.  You're just as important to me as you always were.

To my new friends:  Our everyday lives cross paths continually.  We share children in the same grades, neighbors, everydayness.  I'm thankful to be sharing this part of the journey with you, and know that someday, many of you will be in the old friends category.

To my bloggy friends:  Your uniqueness and sweetness entertains me endlessly.  The fact that you've read this far is frankly amazing :)  Keep writing.

To my family:  You get the shaft sometimes.   You get the tired and worn out version of me sometimes.  The fact that you love me regardless is what makes us family.  Love you.

To my Julie:  You are one of the newest investments of time in our lives.  I look forward each and every day to your emails...you are a part of our lives in so many ways, already.  You soon will be family...and you will get the shaft sometimes...because that's what family does ;)  Love you already.

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