I Finally Get It!

I mentioned the other day, a word I don't particularly care for. W-a-i-t. I do not enjoy waiting...it's probably the reason why God places me in the check-out with the absolute slowest cashier imaginable. Every. Single. Time. I'm there in line thinking to myself,



"Where do they find these people? Can't they see/hear my wild children who have passed the breaking point?!? COME ON!" Yeah, I know...not pretty. But true.



There is hope for me though :) This is what I'm learning. I'm not a Theologian, but Biblically, I'm pretty sure that waiting and eagerly anticipating go hand in hand. In my head though...whole other story! In my head I associate "waiting" as a passive word. For years I have said things like, "I'm praying about such and such, and just waiting on the Lord's direction." Sounds fine, right? What I meant when I said that was not fine at all. What I meant was...I've done what I need to do, I'm just waiting for the Lord to catch up. *UGH* (I want to clarify that not everyone who says that phrase means it like that, but I did) Unimaginable that I would say that to God...up until recently I wouldn't have even realized that's what I was meaning...but through this process of personal revival, God is revealing to me ALL KINDS of things that are hard...and not pretty, but WOW! The freedom that comes from actually becoming aware of that sin, and dealing with it is...incredible.


I am now in the process of eagerly anticipating instead of waiting. What God is showing me, is that He views waiting differently than I do. God is never playing "catch-up" to me...He leads. And the waiting, that seemed so desperately boring, is the very thing that's the most important. I always viewed the end result, whatever I anticipated it to be, as the Big Deal...but the Big deal is actually all the steps of growing and maturing along the way... the waiting :)

I am not eloquent enough to think of words to describe how thankful I am for a Savior who never gives up on me, or tires of me, or loses patience with me. Where would I be without Him?!?

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What On Earth?!?

Generally, I know what I'm going to blog about, before I even sit down. Granted, sometimes it ends up going in an entirely different direction...but still. Today though....nothing. Guess what nothing means! Randomness...in bullet form.

• I learned how to scan pictures!!! Quite amazing, I know. I scanned the first pre-digital picture I could find...which happened to be from my senior prom. Crack. Me. UP! I was not much into the whole prom thing. This pic is our 4th prom together...I actually wore the same dress my Junior year, and then glued fake rhinestones on the back for my senior year....it was 1996, what can I say. If I could do prom now....I would have much more fun...I'd glam it up this time around :)
• Now that I can run my scanner, there will definitely be future posts of some very unflattering pics of me while I was pregnant. I feel it's my duty to let my preggo friends know what "huge" really looks like :)
• I figured out why my site meter timing was wrong. Apparently, it was my fault...imagine that. I've never been very good at military time, thus the problem.
• I started the book Breaking Free by Beth Moore. I walked into the book store intending to get a different book, and walked out with this one. It's amazing. I may be the only person alive that has not read a single Beth Moore book. So now I am reading Breaking Free and doing the Seeking Him study...are you detecting a theme? God's planning something big, I can just feel it.
• Back to bullet point #2 - wouldn't it be fun to start one of those MEME thingys and have everyone post pics of when they were super hugely preggo!?! If only I knew what a MEME really was, and how to do it....HA!
• Seriously, this has to be my most random post yet...it's Monday, what can I say?!?
  

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Hal-le-lu-jah

I experienced a miracle today...a BIG one. You see, I'm in the process of transitioning my 2 year old from the nursery to sitting in church. Yeah...lots of fun. It's a little extra tricky since I'm a single parent during church, since my hubs is the pastor. Three boys, in church, by myself is a challenge. BUT, today, Jake made it through the whole service and fell asleep on my lap! Can I get an AMEN!!!!! WOO HOO!! I was able to actually listen to Ben's sermon...on the four letter word W-A-I-T. (He, by the way, does not call it a 4 letter word. HA!) But I often view waiting that way....I'm not good at it. Today, God knew I needed to hear the message...and now instead of waiting...I am eagerly anticipating...doesn't that sound SO MUCH BETTER! More on that later...

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My Evan Almighty Moment

Last night, my family and I watched Evan Almighty (again.) I like the gist of this movie. Every time I watch it, I end up tearing up! I know, I know, it's a comedy...but there are several things that I love about it. One, is that it shows that God can do whatever He chooses. We can either go along with it, or fight it, but He will accomplish it regardless. The other thing I love, is that right up until the very end...Evan (and his family) are looking for the flood to be caused by rain. How often do I assume I know and understand what God's plan is only to be surprised at what His plan really was!

Last night...something else about the movie hit me, for the first time. It was the bathroom shaving scene. (If you haven't seen the movie, it's in the clip above.) You know the one...he keeps shaving and as soon as he's finished it's grown right back in. Well, I heard a still, small voice say..."Sarah, my beloved...this is your beard...don't fight against the Lego's anymore...they will just grow back. Be at peace...someday you will be sad they're no longer everywhere"

I get it...I heard the message. I am going to live in peace with the millions of Legos that live in every room of my house. Fighting it is futile. Oh the lessons I learn from movies...

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Painful But SO Worth It...

They're cute...I know. I wore them for Easter, I don't mean just church. I wore them all day long. I did take them off for just a bit, while we went out and hunted for eggs. Rumor has it, that my husbands grandma, who's in her 80's gave them a try! She couldn't resist...I know the feeling. They are my latest love in the shoe world. So...guess what these lovely shoes and....

this wonderful Bible study have in common? PAIN!!!! They have both caused me much pain and suffering this week.

The shoes...kill. After church, I had to wrap my big toes, very meticulously, so that the pain from the rubbing would stop, and yet I could not have it showing through the cute peep toe (that was the cause of the pain in the first place!) A little pain has not stopped me before...I have three children to prove that :) These shoes are certainly worth it...and so far, so are my kids. HA!

The Seeking Him study; *OUCH!* Nancy, (we're on a first name basis, she however, does not know this) has been stepping on my toes and pushing me out of my comfort zone all week long! I was going along, totally agreeing with her, and then I got to pages 12-15 "Making It Personal." Yeah...fun times. Hard "Do I?" questions. I found that I had to answer no or I wish for many of the questions. Revival hurts....but is so necessary and worth it...kinda like the shoes :) Okay, okay, more than the shoes!

On a side note...I'm very honored to be mentioned over at www.allthatnaz.blogspot.com go check her out, and I've been reading her other blog (which you'll find after you go to her site) and it's so wonderfully thought provoking and well written. Makes me think I need to take some online grammar/writing classes! Thank you new bloggy friends!

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Icing On the Cake...

The fact that people actually read what I'm writing and comment is amazing...and awards...icing on the cake.

Given By: Enthusiastically ElleBee and Music Mom of 2

Given By: Ponderings of a Pastors Wife





Given By: Mama Belle

Given By: Becoming Me

Given By: Our Moments, Our Memories

Given By: Simply My Thoughts and Cup of Jesus

Given By: MeMe Lorie & Muddlin' Thru Motherhood & Cup of Jesus

Given By: Morning By Morning

Given By: My Cup Runneth Over

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Another Installment...

Well, it's Thursday, so it's another installment of my "Do you think the other Pastors' wives that lived in this parsonage..." bit. If you're new to this, you should click here and maybe here. If you are returning customer, I must say God Bless You for humoring me...and my husband thanks you, because since I've started sharing my list with you...he doesn't have to hear it as frequently :)

This week, I've been thinking about the former pastor's wives as mothers. I've realized that I seem to be in a constant state of flip-flopping. One moment, I'm wishing my boys were bigger..able to do more on their own, and then in the very next moment I wish I could freeze time and keep them 6,5, & 2 forever. As I look through baby pictures, I long to have that time back. I don't particularly want to have another baby...but I do want to experience my boys as babies again. So realistic, I know! I want so much, to be able to enjoy this time...moment by moment, but I need God's help to do that....boy, do I need His help! Ok, here goes the list...

Do you think the other pastors' wives that lived in this parsonage...

• struggled to find the balance between hanging on and letting go.
• had a 2 year old that always prayed for his favorite cartoons first, and then his family.
• was happy on the Sundays that her children fell asleep during the sermon, because then she could actually listen.
• wanted desperately for her children to grow up with a love for ministry, rather than resentment.
• despised the term "PK's" for pastors kids. Why the label? Wondered if those same people call other peoples kids "TK- teachers kid" and "AK - accountant's kid" etc. (thankfully, no one in my church does this:)
• had expectations for her children based on God's standards alone...not other peoples standards.
• wished her children wouldn't ring the church bell on days there is no church :) rascals.
• needed constant reminding from her Savior that these boys were His...He would take care of them...and He loves them even more than she does.
• had a 5 year old who wanted to "deliver God's messages." Not a pastor...but a prophet, like Jonah :)
• had a child who wore clean clothes to bed, as pajamas, so that he didn't have to waste time getting dressed in the morning.
• had a moment, as she tucked them into bed, where she was overwhelmed with her children's ability to love and forgive...unconditionally.
• had to apologize for yelling and losing her cool.
• loved them more than life.

I know the women before me have lived through circumstances that I can only imagine. I am thankful that I can look back at their lives and see how God has been with them, regardless of the circumstances. What amazing gifts I have been given!

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